storms

 

Storm rolling in from Tuesday evening.

Protecting fragile life from hell.

Hiding out in the storm shelter.

Good times.

Let's forget about my now hidden post from Sunday.  If you were lucky to read it just know, I still/he still feels the same way. Yet, to be fair, I shouldn't vomit this portion of my marriage out there. Or maybe, I took it down because I'm ashamed of how I am made to feel.

In truth there are so many storms circulating around us these days. Personal, familial, mate-dom, LIFE - I can hardly breathe.

I would really like to be a kid again and have someone else take care of it all for me. To only worry about playing and not responsible for shit.

Wouldn't that be nice? for all of us?

 

 

Comments

[TUWABVB]

I'm worried about you. And thinking of you. Hoping there's something I can do to help - all you need to do is ask. Otherwise, just know you're in my thoughts and prayers. And that there's always a pretty sky after a storm.

[You can call me Lola]

I was glad to hear your honesty in your now hidden post. It seems like that's the last taboo of blogging- marital problems. I get the same response to the time I spend on the internet and am even off Facebook now because apparently that was the reason I couldn't keep the house clean. Guess what?? It's been 2 months and the house isn't any cleaner! And he's not helping any more than he was... hmmm... could that be the reason??? You are not alone. I think that it was very brave for you to share what you did. Hang in there. Storm have a way of washing everything clean.

[Fluffycat]

When I was a kid, I always wanted to be an adult. Now that I'm an adult, I kind of understand why. I hope you weather the storm.

[the slackmistress]

I read it. Just...hearts.

[Betsey]

I can't tell you how many times I've thought of being the one to just run away after a bad day, week, month...what would it be like to have no responsibilities...to have someone take care of me. Then reality sits in and I wake up at 3AM stressed and in the same situation. I have been reading your blog for quite sometime and can't even try to comment on what you've been through...but wanting to be a kid again...I hear ya there.

[MuseOddity]

You have had too many storms. Praying the current ones ease up a little and give you a break and room to breathe. On a much lighter note, every time I see the photo of your garden plants in the play house I automatically think for a second someone is trying to not-so-discreetly grow pot in their back yard. True story.

[Virginia]

I read it, and I'm worried about you, worried for you. No words of wisdom, but I understand marriage problems all too well. Mine are better now, and I hope yours are better soon too. But it takes work, lots of hard work, to get out of the hole. Hugs.

[a]

Ever since I hit about 28, I've wanted to be 8 again - no responsibilities except for riding my bike and coming home when my mother called. I couldn't leave my block, so I didn't have to worry about anything. No people made any demands of me. That was pretty blissful.

(Also, husbands... Why is it they think every molecule of their being is doing something important, while their wives just laze around all day? I don't get it. It makes me homicidal.)

[Jewl]

hang in chicka, know that you are not alone

[Snow]

Wow...that storm picture is crazy! Hope it looked worse than it actually was...

Sometimes releasing deep personal feelings results in positive repercussions. Sending you positive mojo.

[candice]

I only saw the first few lines (what was in my Google Reader), but I saw enough to know that your marriage is going through a rough season. I say it that way because I really do believe that there are seasons to marriage, some are good, some are not so good. I hope that you guys are able to come through on the other side.

[Sherri]

Didn't get to read it, but you are in my prayers!

[Julie]

Sometimes we say very hurtful things to our spouses out of anger, resentment, stress, exasperation. There are times I want to say very unkind things back, but usually I go to our room and sit in the dark praying for it all to go away.
I can remember my mom saying that she just wanted to run away. I now understand exactly what she meant.
Praying that life gives you a breather from the stress and strain you have been under the past several years.
Maybe you need a road trip up I-35 to good ol' Kansas.

[KK]

I missed the post but can gather the jest from comments. I'm sure you've seen this before:

http://www.divinecaroline.com/22324/37661-did-do-day

[Shauna]

Oh girlie...peace and strength from No Cal. xoxo, Shauna

[Maris]

Didn't see the post but as a child I grew up with parents that were unhappy & fought all the time (not violent fights, just arguing). It scarred me & my brother to this day. The dysfunction was all consuming. Finally last week, my mother actually broke down crying in my kitchen & said she was sorry that we had to grow up in that and that if she could do it again she would've gotten a divorce. My grandma made her feel that it was wrong because we were Catholic, etc. that it would be wrong. My parents are still married & still argue almost daily, about money, about chores.Theynlook for errands to run just to not have to be around each other. Its pathetic. I look at them & they've wasted their lives being unhappy for what, for what "society" will think. It's so sad. My brother sadly ended up in this same kind of marriage. I am sick that they will be bringing kids into it. Luckily, I have a good marriage (95% very happy, 5% bicker about typical crap). Even if you aren't fighting in front of your kids, they can sense unhappiness, resentment, etc...I used to beg my parents to divorce (literally). I wish I could've seen them more fulfilled and my brother & I could've grown up in peace, not tension. It truly gave me some issues I'm still dealing with. Best of luck to you whatever happens. :)