sucker

Who thinks these mannequins are creepy?

I have learned the art of cropping my jowls out of a picture.....and wear mascara on only one eye.

I so thought we were over temper tantrums at seven.... Isn't she cute?

Not-so-much....

Though my nine-year-old thought is was quite funny that I published her sister's tantrum for all the world to see.

but look at those floors! not my daughter's dirty feet....

They really aren't clean. I am trying to fool you into thinking they are liveable. Filters are my best friend along with Photo Shop and beer goggles.

Anywho, I am in the market for a new vacuum cleaner as the old one was used to clean the back of our garage fridge.

As stated from a VERY public Faceook/Tweet:

Rich vacuumed the back of our fridge in the garage and came across something he thought was a leaf. The leaf turned out to be a petrified mouse carcass. Did I mention he was using my HOME VACUUM!?!?!?

Let us not bemoan WHY my husband was cleaning the back of a GARAGE refrigerator because I'm with you, I don't fucking know why....

Since I don't want to be divorced before Christmas because I won't clean our floors and house, I've asked a polling question to the masses:

To Dyson, or not Dyson: that is the question.

Quite a few feel their $600 were put to the test and the test won. Another subset said it was the worst thing they ever purchased. Dude, for $600, this machine better be able to be my surrogate carrier and give my husband the best blow job possible.

So, what vacuum cleaner do you suggest? To clean my carpet and wood floors. Not to give my husband a blow job.

Comments

[Kenna]

Dyson. Love mine, and it survives five cats, two dogs, and three children. Goes from carpet to wood to concrete just fine. Doesn't get around the edges of the kitchen (stained concrete) quite as well as I would like, but that's okay. I actually do sweep there periodicially (like every 6 months before company comes....)

And get him a cheap ShopVac for that kind of crap.

[Pam from Ohio]

We have a Vac-u-flo built into our house and I mostly use that on the main floor. I have an Oreck that I use upstairs (so I don't have to drag the 30-ft hose up there). I LOVE it. Sometimes I use it on the main floor too if I already have it out cleaning the upstairs. Its so lightweight and easy to carry up and down the stairs. Its a lot cheaper than a Dyson. I've had it about 5 years and it still works like new.

[Sarah]

A) No clue, June Cleaver I am not! B) Bwahaha!!!

[Jill]

Okay, I know I will live up to my friend's assertion that I am redneck, or too country, or whatever. BUT- I have tile throughout my house, and with 3 cats and a big ole dog, I use a shop vac. Like one from Home Depot or Lowe's. They can suck the cat hair off a black sweater (don't judge...I couldn't find the lint roller quickly) and they can roll anywhere...its simple to use, to empty, and if you drop it, kick it, or knock it against the cabinets, doors, or furniture, you won't crack a dirt collection cylinder or something expensive to replace. They're MUCH cheaper than a Dyson, and work great. I killed 2 expensive bagless house vacuums in 6 months from the animal hair, and I tried the shop vac and will never go back. Hope this helps, have a great day, Shana! :)

[Becki]

600 bucks???????????? No way - I am too hard on them - and invariably you use them on something you shouldnt as you found out. I just use a regular vacuum with a shop vacuum on the side for the heavy stuff and a wet swiffer for my crappy wood floors after. Because even if you have a GREAT vacuum - you still need to wipe the floor to get the fine layer of film off and make them shine. If they can. ..my wood floors are the original - victims of 70's crazy carpeters so that when we pulled up the crappy carpeting, millions of carpet nail holes were left. Redoing them is like #1000 on the list . .so . .whatever, lol

[Gamanda]

Well, if it's a good vacuum it should give a fantastic bj. Isn't that one of the attachments? No? Hmm.
I'm interested to see what all the comments say. We are currently on the last leg of our generic mid-level Wal-Mart vacuum.

[Andrea]

We had a petrified mouse carcass behind the fridge in our breakroom at work...no clue how long it was there, but we discovered it last week because the fridge sprung a leak and when the mouse got re-moistened, it stunk like shit. Only way worse. WAY worse.
Oh, and I bought a Kenmoore from Sears about 5 years ago. It's still working great.

[grace in chattanooga]

I got the cheapest Dyson possible, less than $400 and I adore it. Of course, I had the worst vacuum ever before that and had it for a thousand years (being poor is not fun, you know??) so I was pretty easy to please (story of my life, I'm afraid). I still like it, one year filled with much dog hair from three inside dogs later.

[justdawn]

I vacuum every day and my Dyson is the first vacuum I haven't had to replace after a year of (ab)use. I have had mine for 5 years now, and it's still going strong. :)

[Jamie]

If you decide to do the Dysin, bed bath and beyond is supposed to be doing a great Black Friday sale for them and target may price match that if you have the ad!! I love my Dyson, but got it at a pretty steep employee discount and don't know if I would feel the same if we'd paid more.

[britt]

How often do you vacuum? Truthfully. I vacuum one room weekly and the rest of the house WAY LESS than that b/c I don't care about what people think about my vacuuming habits, they only see that one room and it will be vacuumed before they come in my house.

Anyways, with that said DO NOT BUY a windtunnel. they are awful
I bought a shark navigator http://www.amazon.com/Navigator-Upright-Bagless-Cleaner-NV22L/dp/B002IPHBNE/ref=sr_1_1?s=home-garden&ie=UTF8&qid=1346358701&sr=1-1&keywords=Shark+Navigator+Upright+Bagless+Vacuum+NV22LWM

I love it, but it does have a tiny dust cup that must be emptied with each vacuum session (even when I vacuum more than once a week) I have never had a dyson so I can't compare anything except price (navigator is 100-120 bux)

[180360]

I went through vacuum shopping last year and was *this close* to buying a Dyson but... I read too many conflicting reports. There are a lot of lovers and haters out there! In the end, I bought a $99 Hoover. Even though I absolutely hate to subscribe to buying things and throwing them out, I truly don't think anything is made to last these days. I'm not ready to drop 600 bucks on something that will likely break within a year or two. The cheap-o I bought sucks just fine, is not too loud, has a retractable cord (love this feature) and is bagless. At the end of the day, if the canister is full of shit, the vacuum has done its job, right? (http://www.bestbuy.com/site/Hoover---WindTunnel-HEPA-Bagless-Upright-Vacuum---Sage-Green-Metallic/9497699.p?id=1218114707539&skuId=9497699#tabbed-customerreviews -- seems to be more $ on this site.)

[a]

Mascara on one eye? Hahahahahahaha

[Karla]

I'm team Dyson. I've had mine for 8 years and the only trouble I've had is when the beater blade is so loaded up with hair that it needs to be cut out. I've even taken it all apart and washed it out (after my husband vacuumed up apple juice coated baking soda which proceeded to ferment in the cannister).

I love my Dyson and don't ever want to give it up.

[Fluffycat]

I love my Dyson. I got it at Costco and it was under $500. I now have no carpets but I use the hard wood floor tool and that works just fine. I've had it over five years and have had to clean it out a few times but it still sucks! And ugh on the mouse carcass.

[Amy]

I have a Dyson and it does great. I have 2 dogs that shed and other couldn't find anything that would last more than 9 months- a year until this. Had it for years and it's still wonderful. Had a belt break, called Dyson and they send a new one free of charge 2 days later.

[Jewl]

love mine, im a fan, ya get what you pay for, as the saying goes. that pic is hilarious of the manequins, i did a second look, too funny!

[Courtney in FL]

I hated my Dyson at first ( I used the coupon at Bed,Bath...to get it down to $400). Now that I have had it a few years, I no longer hate it,but it is still just a vacuum. I'm not in love with it and I wish I had spent the money on something else. Just my two cents. Sending you good vacuum juju! :)

[Lisa]

Definitely Dyson. My husband adopted ours and I rarely vacuum in the 5 plus years we have had it. Also, Dyson customer service has been great...sending us free replacement parts including the entire canister next day air...with only asking what might be wrong....

Tip: do you have a bed, bath and beyond? If so, find one of their 20% off coupons. And use it on the Dyson. Nice savings...plus although they have an expiration date..they don't really expire. BBB also has a liberal return policy. When I bought mine there wasn't really a time limit for return...and the vacuum could be used and returned if I didn't,Ike it.

[Jennifer]

We had a similar thing happen in AZ. We had an "add-on" section to that house that was basically not used. We had a grand piano there (long story), and were getting ready to put our house on the market so my husband was reaching the vacuum to the back. Sucked up some goo. Turned out to be the goo of death! (It was a form of rotting mouse) He tried to bleach the parts, sterilize any parts that he could-nothing would get rid of the death smell. It was disgusting, and unusuable. It was also my favorite vacuum, still is. Oreck all around-lightweight and will clean the hell out of carpet. I think they are right around $300?

[Sylvie]

I have had a refurbished Dyson bought off of Woot.com for 6 years and I will never buy anything else ever again!

[Sizzle]

I got a refurbished Dyson Animal on overstock and it's been amazing. We have a lot of carpet in the new house plus two cats. It works so well!

[Georgia]

I bought a Dyson at Bed Bath and Beyond when they still honored the 20% off coupon for them - they don't anymore in Va anyway. The Dyson was SO heavy and hard to drag around and it's not like I needed any less of a reason to want to clean. I now have a Shark Navigator and love it. It's light but really gets the tumbleweeds of cat and dog hair that fly around the house. Works great on carpet and hardwood. I unfortunately use it about every day and for about $180 it was completely worth it.

[Elizabeth]

I saw this site listing a Home Depot special on a Dyson today and remembered you were considering one, then remembered I don't know you IRL so I hope this isn't too weird. Looks like a good deal though - free shipping too, but only good today 11/13: http://www.bargainblessings.com/dyson-dc35-digital-slim-vacuum-additional-tools-only-249-99-shipped/

[Linda]

Dyson has many, many fans but I can't stomach (or afford!) $600 for a vacuum cleaner. So we buy a new one every 3 or so years and shop at Big Lots or wherever is having a sale, on the bagless upright type of cleaner. I've never spent over $100, and can put up with noisy cleaners because my kind of vacuuming rarely takes very long!

[KK]

Dyson. When/if mine should meet it's demise, I will replace with same. Assuming there's not anything better on the market. Now if there is a Competitor with a BJ attachment, I might have to consider switching teams. Then the Hub would most definitely be inclined to use it more often.

BTW, truly gross confessional here. I found a cremated mouse carcass in of all places my oven! I still shiver at the thought. I'm assuming he found his way in via the burner vent.

[lara]

We have the Dyson pet hair vacuum. It's good - but really heavy, and thus impractical for a 3-story row home. Why do I think I saw a deal on the Dyson in Target's Black Friday ad? Might want to check!

Anyhoo, I pretty much don't vacuum. The cleaning lady does it once every two weeks, God bless her, and then I occasionally break out the dustbuster. This doesn't do much for the navy blue rug in Baby Bear's room, which is usually covered in yellow dog and cat hair after the first few days.

[Patricia]

I saw this deal today and thought of you. It is a Dyson DC41 Animal Upright Vacuum (refurbished) from an authorized dealer for $290 w/free shipping. I have never owned a Dyson, but my girlfriend has one I have envied for years. I picked this one up and can't wait to use it.

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Dyson-DC41-Animal-Upright-Vacuum-w-Mini-Turbine-Tool-/200848049318?afepn=5335869999&campid=5335869999&PID=1225267

~Patty

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